I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
