PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
