stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize
