Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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