Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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