i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
