Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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