Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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