Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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