Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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