I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
