just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
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