You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
