Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Dick very happy bro
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
