still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
My feet surprised me
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
