So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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