that's an acceptable place to lick
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
