im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
