I can text with my tongue
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Randomize
