drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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