He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
As shirtless as possible
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
