We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
