Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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