No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
