i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
