on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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