Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
