Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize