I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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