Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
