Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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