I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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