Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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