You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
