you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
