When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
