you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
