I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Randomize
