I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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