But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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