Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
