There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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