So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
