i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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