please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Randomize