i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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