did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
