You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Randomize
