How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize