dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
We're not piercing ourselves today.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
